INFERTILITY, LOVE AND CLAIRE
“My husband, Brock, and I were married a year after we graduated college. We knew we wanted to be parents, but felt it was important to spend the first year of our marriage focused on each other, our careers and building a life together. In April 2013 we bought our first home and wrote a verse on one of the beams about starting a family. We just knew that was the home we would soon start our family in, and even went to Mexico as a “one last vacation before the baby” trip. We couldn’t know at that time that God had a very different journey in store for us.
By January 2014 we decided to see a doctor when we still were not pregnant. After rounds of tests, we did not have a definite answer as to why we were having trouble conceiving. Our doctor recommended that we move forward with IUI (artificial insemination) that May. I was positive it was going to work – how could it not? But after three rounds of IUI, months of different fertility drugs and every old wives tale under the sun, we still did not have a baby. We had a long discussion with our doctor in Fayetteville and, ultimately, decided to move forward with seeing a fertility specialist.
The closest fertility clinic is two hours from our home in Fayetteville. We had our first appointment in October 2014. More rounds of blood work and testing followed, including another monitored IUI cycle. When it failed, we made the decision to move forward with IVF (in vitro) in January.
The new year was such an exciting time for us. With IVF, you have daily or every other day appointments to monitor progress and have blood work done, paired with multiple shots a day and tons of oral medication. Although we were overwhelmed with emotions, Brock and I felt we were weeks away from finally seeing those two pink lines. And then the unthinkable happened. We were three weeks into the cycle and days away from the egg retrieval when our cycle was cancelled due to poor response to the medication. I remember crying the entire way home from Tulsa to Fayetteville. I had prepared myself for a lot of different outcomes when we started the IVF process, but a cancelled cycle never crossed my mind. I felt broken, and for the first time in two years began to really question my faith and whether or not we would ever become parents.
Brock and I opened our devotional the next morning to read “In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you,” and “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you.” The devotion talked about God leading us, step by step, and we must trust Him and let Him guide us – even when our future looks uncertain. It said to return to Him when we find ourselves worrying about the future and He will show us the next step forward. Brock and I felt an immediate sense of peace. It became very clear that our pain was part of a bigger plan and we needed to continue forward and try again.
We started the second round of IVF within a few weeks and transferred two embryos on April 26. One implanted, and we were blessed with our miracle baby January 12, 2016. Claire Elizabeth has shown us that God’s plan is always greater than ours. Our journey was humbling and heartbreaking, but we would not change one thing because it led us to our sweet Claire. We are incredibly thankful for our family and friends who stood by us every step of the way. Claire will always be a reminder of the support we have surrounding us, the love and commitment Brock and I have for one another, and the power of prayer. We are so excited for this next chapter.”